The classiest way to be “that creepy house” this Halloween.

by Chris Muldoon

Growing up, trick-or-treating was some serious business. Us kids would plan our costumes for weeks, while our parents would coordinate who would be the chaperone and who would be the candy-giver-outer. When All Hallows Eve finally arrived, the block was run amuck with ghosts, princesses, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. But among all the chaos, there was one unmistakable rule – DON’T GO OVER TO THE MEAN GUY’S HOUSE!

Now, I never saw, let alone met, The Mean Guy. Honestly, I don’t think anyone did. So how he acquired such a stigma is a mystery. Didn’t matter though. He could have been giving away Hershey’s bars the size of a giant novelty check, and no one was stepping foot in his yard.

My point is, I’m sure every neighborhood has a house that’s been blacklisted from the trick-or-treating route. Heck, perhaps you even want to achieve such a status. Maybe all you want to do is watch It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown in peace. Totally understandable.

Here’s the solution. Just hook your computer up to a projector, throw a sheet over the window, and you’re set with just enough sketchiness for your neighbors to say, “There’s a good chance he laces his candy with razor blades, but at least he appreciates high production value.”