by Chris Muldoon
Note: Recently, I’ve had a couple hostile encounters with a gentleman in the park near my house. So instead of provoking him further, I’ve decided to vent my frustrations via the internet. And since this technically is a blog about advertising, I’m disguising my anger to the tune of Bud Light’s award-winning radio campaign, “Real Men of Genius”. To refresh your memory, you can listen to a bunch of the ads here.
Crowley Webb presents Real Men of Jerkiness.
(Reaaaaaal men of jerkiness.)
Today we salute you, Mr. Inconsiderate Dog Walker Guy.
(Mr. Inconsiderate Dog Walker Guy!)
You’re a maverick. The world can’t rein you in.
Which must explain why you refuse to keep your canine on a leash.
(Run free little poochie.)
Is it a bullmastiff? Perhaps even a rottweiler?
I don’t know, but it’s huge and running towards me – and it looks pretty hungry.
(Grrrrrrrrrrrr.)
Does it faze you when someone politely asks you to keep your pet under control?
Heck no. You just tell them to mind their own business, and accuse them of being selfish.
(Oh the reverse psychology!)
Some people may call you a bully, a brute, or just plain rude.
But only a class act could eloquently resort to insults only a middle-school boy would be proud of.
(Take that you butt-face.)
So crack open a can of Pedigree, oh Sultan of Self-absorption
Because thanks to you, the park has literally gone to the dogs.
(Mr. Inconsiderate Dog Walker Guy.)
